Mormons Are Sooooooo Queer!

So you may have heard that there was a bit of a scuffle at the Mormon temple grounds in Salt Lake City a few weeks ago. A couple of boys were walking home from a concert and were *gasp* kissing as they walked through a thoroughfare which is owned by the LDS church.  Well, anyone who was paying attention during last November's election news remembers that the Mormons are none too fond of the gays (remember how they donated something like $25 million to back California's Proposition 8?). So they got their panties all in a twist over these young men kissing, and they asked them to leave, and the boys got a little belligerent… long story short: the queers are pissed at the Mo's again (as are all of us non-bigoted straights).

Penetration? Really? 
 Any film buffs out there?

This hatred of the gays is totally ingrained in the Mormon mind. It is considered an absolute truth that homosexuality is "wrong," whatever that means, and that heterosexual love is the only valid love. Ok, so there's nothing special in that- bigotry is the hallmark of dozens of religions. What makes this issue so particular to the Mormons is that the cornerstone of their belief system is a very specific view of what a family should look like, and a laser focus on family as a concept.

This view of family is so exacting that Mormon housewives in Utah turn out to be one of the largest demographics for the consumption of anti-depressants in the Country. The expectations are ridiculous, and for most women unattainable.  Of course, the expectations of the men is entirely unequal. The men are the holders of the "priesthood," which is not like priesthood in other Christian traditions, but is given to all the men and has associated magic powers that women can't have.  Thus, the men are the power mongers, and the women are to be the subservient, obedient little balls of happiness. It's all very Leave it to Beaver in Mormon land. [For more info on the ideal Mormon marriage, see if you can track down the "Natural Family Resolution" that was drafted by the Mormon "think tank" The Sutherland Institute. It might be a little hard to get to- they seem to have buried it deep in the recesses of their collective unconscious. There's a fun snippet of it here under the heading "Controversy"]

 Note the women's toothy smiles and dead eyes

The leaders of the Mo church, their "first presidency" validated and codified this thinking back in 1995 in an archaic little document they titled The Family: A Proclamation to the World.  Gross.  It basically says that everyone who doesn't have a nice Ozzy and Harriet lifestyle is going against God's wishes, and will be forever glared at and distrusted by the good people in their neighborhood, amen.

There is, of course, a delightful irony in all this: we're talking about MORMONS here- these are the people who introduced non-traditional marriage to America! The fact that they now march in lock-step with other hateful conservative douchebags chanting "one man, one woman" is a complete betrayal of their God-ordained history.  And don't let them fool ya, either: they still believe in polygamy, they just don't practice it here anymore. The best example of their continuing belief in polygamy is LDS apostle Russell Nelson, who has been out front in the mormon "one man one woman" push.  Oh, and he has two wives.

Shocked? Confused?  It's true! 

In fairness, I suppose I should mention that one of them is dead, and he didn't marry the second until after the first one passed on. The problem is that in Mormon belief, that doesn't matter.  Brother Nelson was "sealed" to his first wife in the temple "for time and all eternity." Which to them means just that- they're married here and in the afterlife. Forever. He was also sealed to his second wife for the same duration.

Now, had the roles been reversed- that is, had Russell died and his wife had wanted to remarry- she would've had to obtain a "cancelation of sealing" nullifying the old marriage, or she would not be able to be sealed to the new beau. They're very strict about that. Women can only be eternally sealed to ONE MAN. However, our boy Rusty, being a man, can be sealed to as many women as he likes.  This is because polygamy is still sanctioned by the church- just not practiced. 

Make no mistake- by LDS theology Russell M. Nelson is married to two women and will be with both for the rest of eterniy.  By their own rules, he is a polygamist.  And by his own stated belief in the "one man, one woman" rule he is a hypocrite. A big, fat, ugly, stupid hypocrite!

Shit. This was supposed to be a short entry to introduce my new category of entries on this site: Redacted.  Damn you, tangential mind!  I'm going to have to make that the next entry. Poop on a stick! Well, now you have something to look forward to.

6 thoughts on “Mormons Are Sooooooo Queer!

  1. toothy smiles and dead eyes? you’re making things up. they look like nice people. wouldn’t surprise me if you’re jealous. anyways, methinks the “hateful conservatives” label mentioned here, has the same glue as the “hateful atheists” label applied by the christians in the other topic. that makes you a hypocrite.

    I am as atheist as an atheist could be, but I do have to say that when you attack the god worshippers for -having- values, such as holding it wrong to be a homosexual, or appreciating a good family, etc etc whatever, that’s a seperate issue from when they do it simply because their church tells them to- which was how you started off describing it, but didn’t end up.

    there’s nothing wrong with having values.

  2. You are truly uneducated. Do you even know why we accepted polygamy for a time. No, of course you don’t. Let me paint a picture for you. Thousands of christians pushed out of their homes in the dead of winter. Mobs killing them children and women. The men took the worst hit though. Leaving hundreds of women and children with no way to survive, this was the 1800’s women did not work. So instead of letting scared little atheists like you commit genocide, The Prophet was told my GOD to have the remaining men take the women and children a join together in a family. For survival. Maybe if you knew what you ” blogged” about, people would believe you. Oh and by the way NO WE ARE NOT LIKE YOU, WE DON’T WANT TO BE. WE ARE TRYING TO BE LIKE GOD.

  3. Why does Russell M Nelson having 2 wives in the eternities trouble you? I thought you were to intelligent to believe in something like God or life after death? I smell a rat…posing as an atheist!

  4. @Sister Freeland,

    Are you aware that polygamy has been against the law in the United States, ever since the US came about? SO, you are telling us that God ordered your prophet to break the law. THAT REALLY MAKES A LOT OF SENSE. For that matter, then why do we even have laws to begin with then? Anyone who breaks the law under “GODS” orders is okay, anyone else must be punished. Here is another question for you “If God did not want women and children to be without, then why not just magically create more men (he created Adam after all) or better how about not let the other men die to begin with?” It was probably too much work for that. Your comment “scared little atheists” shows how bigoted you are. Was it atheists that donated millions of dollars to Proclamation 8? What is it any skin off your people’s back who someone else loves? I know! It is because your imaginary friend told you that it was. You guys cry how terrible mormons were treated, yet you guys show just as much hate to gays and anyone that does not share your beliefs.

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